Peeking Duck

Many people have some form of a fear; however, the extent of these fears vary greatly from person to person. The common ones include fear of the dark, of heights, of confined areas, and of flying. But not everyone's fears are common or even able to be understood by others. Some fears are simply what people would consider weird. One phobia that is not well-known and ridiculed by many of the people that are aware of it is anatidaephobia. Anatidaephobia is the pervasive, irrational fear that one is being watched by a duck no matter where they are or what they are doing. A person suffering from this fear usually has a traumatic experience as a child. Such experiences may include being flapped at or bitten by a duck, goose, or swan or simply being frightened by their abrupt or unexpected presence. This fear usually stays with a person for years and can become very intense. People may perspire, pass out, or have a panic attack at the thought of being watched by ducks. If a person feels that their symptoms are getting out of hand, they may seek counseling, therapy, or hospitalization for their condition. Anatidaephobia can interfere with every aspect of a person's life. It can ruin one's ability to make friends, maintain a job, and live peacefully. For many, the image of a duck watching them is hilarious and the prospect of such an image turning into a fear is crazy, but for those that struggle with this fear daily, the idea of a stalking duck is far from funny.

When I heard about this fear I was compelled to research it. I honestly could not believe that such a phobia could exist. As I researched, I found that some people believe that Anatidaephobia is unreal and that it was created by Gary Larson and published as one of his Far Side cartoons. On the other hand, there are people that truly believe that this phobia is real and affecting people all over the world. I do not have a stand on either side of this debate because I believe that no matter how the knowledge of this fear has spread, the fact is that it has spread. Some people will choose to self-diagnose themselves and others will choose to deny that this condition even exists. Everything boils down to what kind of person you are.

Who Owns the Moon? America...Right?

Last night, as my sisters and I were waiting to catch the train from New York City back home to New Jersey, we randomly began talking about the moon. My older sister, Tammy, and I were already aware of NASA's plans to build a space station on the moon since they received evidence that there is water up there. On the other hand, my younger sister, Marie, was clueless. She began to ask questions like, "How did they find out there was water up there?" and "Will the moon be okay with this?" The questions that really struck me were the ones that centered on America's control over these moon experiments and future plans for the moon. Marie asked us, "Is America in charge of the moon?" and for once, we couldn't answer her question with the truth or even a lie that sounds truthful because we honestly were not sure.

America has taken control over the moon and I am left wondering, are their actions right? Countries like China and Russia are smarter than us so why didn't they decide to build a space station on the moon? More importantly, what are these countries, and the rest of the world, saying about America's decisions? The moon isn't American. We didn't purchase the moon. What our country decides to do may effect the world, so why didn't the entire world agree on this? Why is it that America is the country that is allowed to take control? I wonder what our country would say if China or Russia declared that they are going to build a space station on the moon. My guess is that we'd think of all of the reasons why the shouldn't and why this should be a global decision since the moon is important to every country. Overall, I guess we wouldn't agree to it. I am no genius on the topic of the moon and this is why I am wondering so much about it.

Bad is Never Good Until Worse Happens

Today, as I was checking my facebook, I came across someone's status that read: 'Bad is never good until worse happens. - Danish Proverb" The meaning of this proverb was unclear to me at the time, but after some thought, I understood it. I interpreted it to mean that when bad situations occur, they remain bad situations until something worse happens. Then, when something worse occurs, the previous bad situation is considered good since it isn't as bad as the ladder situation. Now, I understand it, but I am still confused by its meaning.

Here is a series of hypothetical situations to match this proverb:
Situation 1: My dog dies. I loved my dog since the day we picked her up at the store. These past weeks have been really hard for her and I've been there as often as I could be. There was nothing I could do though; she was sick and I guess it was just her time to go. I feel completely out of whack. I can't concentrate on school, my job, nor my friends. This sucks!
Situation 2: WOAH! I know I'm not the greatest at math, but damn, am I really this bad? I just got my test back and I completely bombed it! There were 25 questions and I only got 8 correct ! My final grade will definitely take a beating. Unfortunately, it's the end of the semester and there's not much improvement that I am able to make. This completely sucks!

Now, according to the proverb, am I supposed to consider my failing grade a horrible occurrence and the death of my dog a good one? To me, the proverb is wrong because I would still consider the death of my dog bad and my failing grade worse, but that doesn't make the death a good thing ! Maybe I am thinking too hard on this simple proverb, but I am curious as to what the author was thinking when this was written. Any suggestions?

"You're Too Young to Dance Like That!"

Swing Dancing has been my favorite form of dance ever since I was three-years-old. My swing partner, Andre, and I have been dancing together since the first day Swing dancing was introduced in our small pre-school. Our parents saw that we took a strong liking to the music and the form of dance so they enrolled the both of us in a program that aimed to teach small children the art of swing. At the age of ten, we were already competing against older, much older, people and shockingly, we were coming in very high rankings. However, our love for the dance did not come because we enjoyed winning competitions; in fact, we hated practicing the same moves repeatedly, which was a process that we had to go through several months before each of our competitions. Overwhelmed by the stress of practicing and unsure of why we even began swing dancing in the first place, we decided to quit and follow different paths. Andre started playing football and began saxophone lessons while I became a cheerleader and began ballet dancing.

Our new paths were not as fun or cool as we expected them to be. Cheerleading bored me just as football bored Andre. Although Andre loved playing the saxophone, he began to realize that playing the instrument just wasn't as fun as dancing to it. To me, ballet was too structured. From day one, were told to dance a certain way, to do certain moves, and dress in specific clothing. Where was the freedom? My mind constantly drifted back to my first love, swing dancing, and all the freedom that came with it. We were only forced to wear specific outfits when we were in competitions or recitals. Furthermore, we were taught certain moves, basic moves; however, we were permitted to dance outside of these moves as often as we desired to.

Swing dancing is the dance for me! When Andre and I were fourteen, we started to dance together again. This time, we decided that ti was better not to compete. We enjoyed small swing dance gatherings in the park and we attended several jazz-big band parties with our parents and the kind people that we met during our competitions. We would often hear older people comment, "Those two are too young to dance like that." or "Wow, the look ten but they have the soul of people in their thirties!" To me, the thought of being too young for this dance was rediculous! After all, it is just a form of dance.

This dance is not as easy as some poeple may think it to be. To be able to flip, dip, spin, and step takes devotion and much practice. My hardest obstacle in swing dance came when I had to establish trust in Andre. When we were fourteen, we started to incorporate lifts and airsteps into our routines. The thought of one day being dropped was too scary for me so for a while, I avoided these moves. The first time that I attempted to spin during a lift was fun and exciting and I completely forgot that I was once afraid.

The upbeat, vivacious music and the elegant, unpredictable moves of swing dancing have been embedded in my mind, heart, and rhythm at an early age and regardless of the activities that I am doing, swing dancing will always be number one.

Three Cups of Tea

Overall, I enjoyed reading Greg Mortenson's story. It inspires me to find my purpose and carry it out to the best of my ability. Here are three in-depth examples of the ways in which this book has inspired me.

1) Sometimes, where you think you're headed is not where you end up and where you end up may very well be your new destination.

Greg Mortenson was on a mission to reach the top of K2, a mountain in Pakistan. However, he got very lost in route. A group of people, from an impoverish village, found Greg lying down in the cold snow and they immediately took him in. When Greg recovered, he was distraught that he did not reach the top of the mountain, but he was happy to see kind people surrounding him. After seeing the horrible conditions that the children bore in order to learn, Greg promised to return to this village and build them a school.

Greg did not expect this to happen at all. All he wanted to do was climb to the top of the mountain in honor of his deceased sister. Sometimes life throws us a curve-ball and we just have to swing, and that is exactly what Greg did. Instead of calling his experience a failure, he acknowledged it as the beginning of a new phase in his life.

2) If things are meant to be, they will fall into place.

Now, Greg had a plan, he even made a promise, but how was he possibly going to raise the money to carry it out? This worry was constantly in the back of his mind, but it wasn't enough to cause him to give up. Though he had countless failed efforts to raise money, he still attempted new things. He knew that somehow, somewhere, someone would take interest in his cause, and luckily, someone finally did. Although it took a longer time than he expected it to, the money arrived! This fortunate donation was the motivation that Mortenson needed in order to realize that this was his calling and that everything will turn out good.


3) Go with what your heart is telling you.

Greg had some very huge decisions to make. Two decisions that stand out are as follows:
The first is when Greg finally had all of his supplies needed to build his first school. He left his supplies with a man that owns a lodge and when he returned, the supplies was gone. He was taken to the man's house and the man began to discuss plans with him. Plans? This was not a part of Mortenson's plans! Mortenson just wanted his supplies; he did not want to build a school in this village because he didn't promise this village anything. He followed his heart and gathered the shortage of supplies and took them to it's rightful owner.

Near the end of the book, Mortenson was traveling in a very dangerous place in Afghanistan. He was met by a well-respected, affluent man. They were going to discuss having schools built in a dangerous area. Mortenson knew that by agreeing to do this, he would be forced to devote a large amount of time, money, and effort. He thought able his wife and the baby this is expected to come soon and all of the time that he would need to spend in Afghanistan, far from home. However, these worries were not enough to stop him. He followed his heart and agreed to build schools there because he knew that his work was not finished.

More Germs than the Germophobics Can Handle

As I was getting ready for class this morning, I overheard some interesting information being given on the Early show. The portion that particularly caught my attention was one that centered on germs and the unexpected places that they lerked. People were asked, "Where do you think the most germs can be found?" Responses ranged from things like the door knobs, toilet bowls, and faucets, but the Early show news crew had a surprise for them.

A doctor at the University of Arizona seeked to answer the question stated earlier. He tested many items and recorded the amount of germs that they contained. One item stood out amongst the others: the cell phone. When he tested the cell phones owned by Health Inspectors, he found that all of them were infected with 94.5% of bacterial germs.

The thought of my cell phone being germy didn't occurred to me before. Now I realize that it really does go everywhere with me. I throw it in my purse, put it on tables, drop it on floors, and so on. Moreover, my hands also add to the amount of germs. i text after or while I'm eating, after class, and while I am on public transporation before I have the oppertunity to wash my hands.

For the extreme germophobics out there, how could they possibly keep their cell phones germ free?

Here are some radical ideas that I thought of:

1) Place a cover over your phone that protects the entire apperatus. Before talking or texting, remove the cover, wash your hands, and then proceed to talk or text.

2) Place your cell phone in confined areas (i.e. pockets and pouches) that are not occupied by any other objects.

3) Do not place your phone on any surfaces, even those found in your own home.

4) Routinely disinfect your phone with the power of Lizol, but please do not use your phone immediately following this cleaning process.

Regardless of the methods one may choose to use when desiring to stay germ free, there are always going to be little germs that continuously return. Therefore, taking extreme precautions to avoid germs is a waste of time because all of the germs will never go away.

"Why are your eyes like that?"

My visual impairment is a big part of who I am. I was born with it, so after 18 years of experiences, I am pretty sure that I'm accustomed to it. When older people, or even people my age, ask me about my vision, I can easily answer them by explaining my diagnosis, giving a numerical comparison between my horrible eye sight and the eye sight of most people, and attempting to describe what I can see. What does not stop surprising me is the fact that I have had more younger people, usually 13 years and younger, ask me than people my own age or older. So here's where a problem arises, how do I answer these kids?!

Attempt #1: "How did your eyes get like that?"
Well, that's an easy one! "At birth, I was diagnosed with Glaucoma, Aniridia, Microphthalmia, Bilateral Cataracts, Nystagmus, Ptosis, and probably more conditions that I don't know how to pronounce nor spell." The big words may not serve as a way to help the kids understand, but I bet it helps them lose interest in the question, yes! Fine, maybe I should explain in smaller words. "So, my eyes are little (michrophthalmia) because they are shrinking. As you can see, one is shrinking more than the other and as that eye gets smaller, my eyelid begins to droop (ptosis). The sun and bright lights make it really hard for me to see (Aniridia). And overall, my vision is this bad because the lenses, like eyeglass lenses, in my eyes are dirty (Bilateral Cataracts), my eye sight is sometimes really shaky (Nystagmus), and my eyes hurt because inside, the pressure is building up (Glaucoma)." I bet the kid won't remember half of what I just said, however, I feel good knowing that I said it. Sometimes, simply attempting to explain my eye situation satisfies them.

Attempt #2: "How many fingers am I holding up?"
Some kids don't bother to ask me what's wrong with my eyes because it is already apparent to them that there is a problem. So, in an attempt to measure my vision, they ask this question. My initial reaction is that of pure disgust. I begin to think of all the rude ways to respond. As I stick up my middle finger I'll ask them, "how many fingers am I holding up?" Or if I'm REALLY pissed, I'll say something like, "however many fingers you stick up your mom!" However, when I open my mouth to answer them, none of that stuff comes out, luckily. Instead, I reply, "I'm sorry, I really cannot see how many fingers you're holding up right now because my vision is really bad in this light." The truth s, it's really bad in most lighting situations so this response is a lie.

Attempt #3: "Mommy, what's wrong with her eyes?"
Before going to ask a stranger, like me, about what's wrong, kids opt to ask their parents, more commonly, their mothers. Out of all of the instances that I have had concerning curious children, this has to be the most painful one. As I observe the dialogue and actions between the mother and her child, after the child asks this question, I become saddened. In most cases, the mom will just shuffle their child away and look at me with, what I can guess, a sad look. In other cases, the mom will try to explain by using crazy phrases like "her eyes are sick" or just simply stating, "she can't see." What hurts me about these statements is that for one, my eyes are sick but the child will never know why or to what extent and secondly, ma'am, I can see ! Wow, as much as I struggle to find the best way to answer a child's questions, I would rather answer them than have someone else do it.

Conclusion and Apology:
So you've seen three possible scenarios that could occur when I am faced with a curious child. Each of them have their good and bad aspects and none of them are perfect. I guess when dealing with children, I have to handle it one situation at a time.

Now that I've discussed that, let me state that I am truly sorry if you thought that my contemplated responses to "How many fingers am I holding up?" were very offensive or somewhat disturbing. I confess, these comebacks are only two of the many ones that me and my blind friends have come up with. We would definitely NOT say these things to children, let alone any person that we do not know well. However, after being asked this question so many times and in the most disrespectful manners, I sometimes cannot help but to think of all the mean ways that I could respond so that the child could sense how annoyed and disrespected I really feel.